News Cast Part One

Heres one when Jeff Hardy got suspended in mid 2007. I thought it would be funny to make it into a late night news discussion thing.

Hello I am Trent Gannigan (TG) the hunky news host from Doomnocracy News, Today on the hotline we have former WCW/ WWE Wrestler Chris Kanyon (K) on the Phone. He will have a regular segment with us & will be discussing the latest ongoings in the wrestling business. Giving us his views & such.

Kanyon interrupts also the leader of Team Home-O the home for homosexuals.

TG: Yes Kanyon is also the spiritual leader of Team Home-O, but onto the topic in hand. Why has Jeff Hardy been missing RAW yesterday.

K: I believe Jeff Hardy is contemplating on joining Team Home-O, hence why he missed Raw. You see coming out is not so easy, as theres a lot of factors to consider. So you need some time to yourself.

Like myself, well actually it’s a funny story. You see years ago some local lady thought it would be funny to say that I made her pregnant. You know I had the authorities asking me to give payments for the child. I ignored the letters as I don’t fuck women, so there was no way I made her preganant. But then one night while me & Markoni were practicing wrestling moves in the bed upstairs. A knock knock happened. Then the next thing that happened is a whole swat stormed my shack. You know that was a wet dream of mine back in my teens. A whole male swat team invades my shack & we party all night singing 'In the Navy'. Well it wasn’t like that dream whatsoever and instead they were saying that they have a warrant to search the shack & uncle toms cabin. So I went along with it & pretended that I made her pregnant. That’s because I did not want people to know that I was gay. But I still enjoyed the all male swat team invading my shack, even if it wasn’t for sexual reasons.

-Continued in part two.